You’ve probably heard the term micro-cheating floating around on social media or in relationship advice conversations.
It's one of those buzzwords that gets people side-eyeing their partner’s phone or overthinking every “like” on Instagram.
But what does it actually mean, and how do you know if it’s happening in your relationship?
What is micro-cheating?
Micro-cheating is basically all the little, sneaky things someone might do that could be crossing the line in a relationship but aren’t quite full-blown cheating.
Think of it as the grey area between being totally loyal and being unfaithful.
It’s not always physical, but it can still feel like a betrayal.
It usually comes down to intention and secrecy.
If your partner is doing something they wouldn’t be cool with you doing or if they feel the need to hide it, there’s a good chance it falls into micro-cheating territory.
Common examples of micro-cheating
Here are a few behaviours that might fall into the micro-cheating category:
- Liking or commenting excessively on someone’s social media posts, especially if the interactions have a flirtatious tone.
- Deleting messages, calls, or DMs to hide communication with someone else.
- Keeping contact with an ex without your partner’s knowledge or under the guise of “just friends,” especially if there's emotional secrecy involved.
- Flirting or suggestive joking with someone outside the relationship.
- Saving someone under a fake name or nickname in their phone.
- Constantly talking about a particular person at work or the gym, especially when paired with emotional comparisons.
- Sharing personal or intimate details with someone else that they don’t share with their partner.
Signs your partner might be micro-cheating
It can be tricky to spot micro-cheating because it often hides behind plausible deniability. However, here are some signs that might raise red flags:
They’re overly protective of their phone: Sudden changes in phone habits, like turning screens away, changing passwords, or hiding notifications, can be signs that something’s off.
They're secretive about their social media: If they avoid tagging you, suddenly start following a lot of new people (especially of a certain type), or seem to have conversations that they don’t want you to see, it’s worth asking why.
They mention someone a lot but then stop: Maybe they used to talk about a coworker or friend frequently, but then suddenly stop bringing them up. That abrupt silence can signal that something has shifted.
They downplay or hide certain relationships: If they’re vague about who they hang out with, or you find out they’ve been spending time with someone and didn’t mention it, that could be a sign of micro-cheating.
They dismiss your concerns as jealousy or paranoia: Gaslighting or defensiveness when you bring up your feelings is a serious red flag, especially if you’re approaching the subject calmly and with genuine curiosity.
Get your news on the go, click here to join the IOL News WhatsApp channel.
IOL Lifestyle