South African couples delay marriage as women prioritise careers

South African couples are delaying marriage, stats have shown. Picture: Pexels/Wendel Moretti

South African couples are delaying marriage, stats have shown. Picture: Pexels/Wendel Moretti

Published Mar 24, 2025

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Marriage trends in South Africa are shifting, with more women choosing to delay marriage in favour of financial independence and career growth.

While the overall number of marriages increased in 2022 compared to 2021, long-term trends still point to a change in priorities. According to Statistics South Africa’s Marriages and Divorces report, 111,784 civil marriages, 4,376 customary marriages, and 2,461 civil unions were registered in 2022.

Compared to 2021, civil marriages increased by 5%, customary marriages by a significant 63.5%, and civil unions by 9.9%. However, despite this short-term rise, people are getting married later.

The median age of bridegrooms in civil marriages was 38 years, while the median age for brides was 34 years. For customary marriages, grooms had a median age of 35 years, while brides were younger at 29. Civil unions also followed a similar pattern, with the median ages being 35 and 33 for the two.

Dr Kerry Frizelle, a counselling psychologist at the University of the Western Cape, believes these delays in marriage are a reflection of changing societal attitudes.

“Women are delaying getting married because they firstly want to establish financial independence, develop their careers, and improve their own families’ living standards,” she said.

Stats SA data also shows that 80.2% of men and 85.4% of women who married in 2022 were doing so for the first time, indicating that while marriage is still happening, many are waiting longer before taking that step.

Urbanisation is a major factor in changing relationship trends, said Frizelle.

“With urbanisation, cultural norms are challenged, and other relationship formations, like cohabitation, are tried out by young people.”

However, traditional values still hold strong in certain areas. “Cohabitation is less prevalent in areas with strong traditional practices,” she added.

She added that popular psychologists like Esther Perel are also encouraging people to rethink relationships.

“She suggests that marriages and relationships are generally difficult because we have increasingly been primed by changes in society to rely on one person for all our physical, emotional, and financial needs, which used to be met by a tribe of people,” said Frizelle.

While marriage patterns are evolving, so too are divorce trends. Stats SA recorded 20,196 completed divorce forms in 2022, a 10.9% increase from the previous year. More women (55.8%) than men (33.2%) initiated divorce proceedings, with the median age at divorce being 46 for men and 42 for women. The data also revealed that many marriages do not last long.

“Four in ten divorces (42.2%) were from marriages that lasted less than 10 years,” the report states.

A separate study by Dr Jesca Batidzirai from the University of KwaZulu-Natal found that modernisation and education are also reshaping marriage and family structures.

“Family formations and household structures have been changing, with trends pointing to women having children independent of marriage and married couples with children more likely to divorce,” the study states.

Economic dependence is another factor. “The unemployed and those with no income tend to stay longer in marriages when the other partner is the provider economically,” the study found.

The research also confirmed that younger marriages are more likely to end in separation. “Marrying at younger ages is associated with a future early marital dissolution,” it states.

Early marriages can also take a mental and emotional toll. “They may increase the rates of stress, depression, high blood pressure, aggression, suicidal thoughts, and many other mental health disorders,” the study notes.

THE MERCURY

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