By Sharon Gordon
Johannesburg - Women are constantly under pressure to perform like porn stars and believe me many of try. We will have designer bikini waxes, bleach our anus, and groan in ways that if heard in isolation sounds like wounded buffalo!
We have to find and enjoy our G-Spot, squirt, be able to perform for hours and have multiple orgasms.
Now I don’t know about you, but these days if I can push one orgasm out, I’m ecstatic. Demanding multiples is a stretch too far.
I’m not saying that it’s not possible nor that it isn’t fantastic when it happens, but it is a rare occurrence. It’s almost as if the stars and planets have to align first.
Men also have it rough because let’s face it women can feign being interested but a man needs an erection to perform.
Men often think that they too have to maintain an erection for hours because they’ve seen it in the movies. That’s just it – it’s a movie made over several days, cut and spliced with only one real money shot.
I’ve been reading a lot about multiple orgasms and wondered whether men can have multiple orgasms?
I’ve never had to experience it so I personally cannot answer the question. I’m told from reliable sources that it’s definitely not an urban legend; although male multiple orgasms do sometimes take on a mythic quality Take, for example, Sting, who famously practices Tantra and alleges that he can have 8-hour love making sessions.
The good news is that men can, do, and have had multiple orgasms for thousands of years. Taoist teachings on sexuality that go back farther than that give explicit instruction for men on how they can experience multiple orgasms.
Western sex researchers have also studied this, experience in men and found clear physiological evidence that it happens. My next question is, pardon the pun – does it come naturally, is it a genetic predisposition or can it be taught?
It seems that many men can learn to have multiple orgasms.
The bad news is, like with any skill it takes time and dedication. Learning to have multiple orgasms takes a fair bit of time and practice.
What does multiple orgasms mean for men?
Multiple orgasms means that a man will have a series of non-ejaculatory orgasms. While they aren’t necessarily better or worse, they are definitely different than the kind of orgasms men may be used to experiencing.
Learning to have a non-ejaculatory orgasm requires control, disciple and practice. The same routine should be practiced by men who suffer from premature ejaculation.
The key to having multiple orgasms is exercise. For the majority of men to have a multiple orgasm, they need to exercise their pubococcyx muscles - the pelvic floor muscles that are used to "hold in" your pee."
While it’s virtually impossible for men to have multiple ejaculatory orgasms with no refractory period, you can climax several times in a row if you don’t release any semen.
The technique is known as non-ejaculatory multiple orgasm, or NEMO, and involves strengthening your pelvic floor.
You will need to take your sexual response right to the edge and stop before you tip over and ejaculate. Pull yourself aware from the brink so to speak. It is an important skill especially when you consider the gap between the female and male orgasm. It usually takes her a lot longer to get there.
Having your prostate gland stimulated is another way to experience a different type of orgasm. It is possible to orgasm this way without ejaculation.
The non-ejaculation is important because it is the way to maintain an erection. It’s the ejaculation process that makes the penis return to its flaccid state.
Men also need to perform Kegel exercises; you want to contract the PC muscle as you would when you control the flow of urine as you’re peeing. You can practice Kegels anywhere—like contracting the muscle for 10 seconds while sitting in your car.
Learning to have multiple orgasms means you will also be learning to control ejaculation, and you will learn a lot about your own sexual response, which is great news regardless of the final outcome.