Thy will be done: A living will can ease the burden illness and death place on your family

File image.

File image.

Published Sep 3, 2022

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Johannesburg - Dying is not a conversation most people want to have and yet, as Benjamin Franklin wrote in a letter to Jean-Baptiste Leroy in 1789, “in this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes”.

September 12 – 16 is National Wills Week and while we all know we should have a will in place, have you ever thought about a living will? Among other things, a living will can include where you would want to spend your last days, whether you would like to be kept on life support, who you would like – or not like – to attend your funeral.

Online living will start-up Swansong aims to make the difficult conversations about illness, facing death, and planning a good life to the end easier.

First-to-market in South Africa, Swansong offers virtual, guided end-of-life conversations and planning. Over two one-hour online video sessions, a counsellor helps a client clarify and communicate what is important to them towards the end of their life, documenting all of it into a living will or advance care plan.

Swansong is the brainchild of two South African women, Dr Linda Holding, a palliative care-trained doctor with 20 years of clinical risk management experience and Shivani Ranchod, a health-care actuary and academic.

“The recent Covid-19 pandemic has shown us that being prepared for death is more than simply having a will in place which details how your finances and property will be split up,” said Holding.

September is National Wills week. File image.

She said the Swansong Advance Care Plan contains your decisions around future medical care (the treatment you are prepared to receive and where you want to die – hospital, hospice or home), and the nomination of your health-care proxy (someone who can legally make health-care decisions on your behalf if you can’t communicate). It’s a personalised document that can be changed at any time.

“One of the most valuable gifts you can offer to those you love is to embrace your mortality and be specific about the care you do or do not want to receive, and how you would prefer to die. By planning your end-of-life wishes ahead, you’ll have a voice to the end, and you’ll unburden your family from making tough decisions when the time comes someday,” she said.

Holding said studies showed that when there was a meaningful conversation about end-of-life choices, survivors reported feeling less guilt and depression and having an easier process of grieving.

“When events involve a lot of moving parts, it's common to bring in a specialist. We have planners for weddings, parties, corporate breakaways, and more – people who help us pin down our values, explain complicated rules and contracts and advise on the planning and logistics. When it comes to the most difficult event of all – dying and death, many of us feel on our own. Our trained counsellors will walk you through the life-affirming conversations and planning, gently, and at your pace,” she said.

Swansong project lead Janine Rauch said international studies showed that very few people talk about their end-of-life.

“It's a challenging topic to contemplate, let alone plan and discuss.”

She said it was never too early to prepare a living will.

“Accidents happen. Illness and surgeries increase our risk of needing an advance care plan… the sooner you get your wishes down on paper, the better, no matter what stage of life you are at.”