Gershwin Wanneburg
A friend once told Shihaam Domingo that she was like a woman who constantly had an AK47 at the ready. That’s no longer the case, she says. Not quite. The ‘weapon’ is still there, but she has taken her finger off the trigger.
Domingo, a creative producer in the entertainment industry, attributes her new state of mind to her experience at a wellness retreat in Kleinmond, a picturesque town in the Overberg region.
For years, Domingo had sought various means to address childhood trauma – from therapy to workshops – with no success.
That was until 2020, in the heart of the Covid-19 lockdown, when she was introduced to the retreats presented by psychologist Jude Clark, who is based in Kleinmond and hosts most of her programmes for women at the Grail Centre resort, a secluded spot right on the lip of the mountain.
Other sessions are held in Gauteng and KwaZulu-Natal, from which she hails.
Domingo, who started off as a caterer on the retreats and eventually became a participant, believes that Clark’s unique approach to therapy made all the difference to her healing. Clark’s programmes are designed specifically for black women – a historical term that she uses to encompass Black Africans, Coloureds, and Indians. The two to seven-day retreats focus on a variety of themes, including self-care for non-profit organisation leaders, healing from racism, and storytelling.
“The magnitude of the power of the women that were at these retreats was something incredibly special,” Domingo said.
“It was my first time being in a space where it was only for black women. In attending these retreats, I learnt how important it is to acknowledge black people and black women in the professional space where they get acknowledged for being leaders.”
Amy Brown, a self-described storyteller, said they were perhaps most struck by the intergenerational blend of younger and older women at an “ausie retreat” they attended last year.
“That very area where the Grail Centre is has an energy of its own. It’s definitely part of the things that we shared in. Jude herself is supercharged with that energy. That’s something that I definitely left there with: this understanding that, as a black woman, I am a custodian of this land. ”
Clark, a former academic and private practitioner, started Deep Wellness Retreats in 2019. It was an extension of her work with trauma, which stemmed from the harrowing stories she heard during her internship from women who had experienced domestic violence, rape, and post-traumatic stress disorder following the Truth and Reconciliation Commission process.
She has also co-facilitated institutional transformation processes at SA and international universities and worked with community-based organisations and United Nations agencies.
As for the focus on black women, Clark said it was not about excluding anyone.
“I think that, despite our differences as black women, we do have a shared experience shaped by our history of colonisation and racial classification. This inter-sectionality of our race, class, and gender has made us experience the world in a particular way that is very different to white SA women,” Clark said.
“I see this space as allowing a black woman to take off the outer layers of her armour, so to speak, armour that she generally has to keep on to survive in a world that is still defined by white supremacy and patriarchy.”
Clark’s message to women is: “I think we are all still grappling with the impact of the pandemic, and my advice to women would be to find support – it is out there, to not feel as if you are failing if you are not coping, to connect to other women, to not be alone in coping and in healing.”
Weekend Argus